The Challenge of Challenging Others

Are you challenging?  Most of us want to challenge others; all of us should be.

Many of us see the need for change, but don't know how to challenge others.  Some of us have begun trying to promote change around us, only to find failure because we are ill equipped.  Then there are a few who see the need and have the talent but experience an obedience problem; we simply refuse to act.  Regardless of which of these categories or many others in which you may belong, there are some things to consider when trying to challenge those around you.

Start with you.  Among other things, I struggle with overanalyzing.  I dissect to the nth degree, which often leads to criticism.  And when this is combined with less than amiable experiences, I become cynical.  It's an egregious dilemma when you find yourself thinking the worst of people, situations, etc.  You begin to see only the sin in people and expect it.  Left unchecked and unchanged this will state of mind will leave you in a world where there is no balance.  The power of God is not seen in life and love, forgiveness and redemption where it was meant to be, but in scrutiny and judgement.  This is a continual work God is still doing in my life.   Change must happen, and sometimes this results in some very serious but much needed growing pains.

Before we can challenge others, we must be changed.  (2 Cor. 3:18, 5:17)
Your mind (Romans 12:2), desires (Gal. 2:20),  body (Romans 12:1), purpose (Matt. 5:13-16) and heart (Psalm 51:10-12) are transformed as you grow in a relationship with Christ.  We call this process sanctification.  As Christians, this is a life-long process that we endure until ultimately all that we are is changed; completed restored (1 John 3:2-3).  This is the hope we have in the culmination of God's Plan for His Creation.
Within time, we are all at different points in our spiritual maturity.  It's important to remember that God has always used imperfect people to reveal His perfect Plan and
and that this transformation most often happens when reading Scripture.  Scripture as God's Word has authority whether we choose to acknowledge it or not.  God's Word is the primary means of revelation to mankind.  It is present in both creation and covenant, and its power is not diminished or increased by our rejection or acceptance of it respectively.  It is powerful because God is sovereign and His Words are authoritative.  However, and the reasons for this are a different theological discussion altogether, we have been given the choice of rejecting or accepting Scripture in our lives.  And unfortunately, most of us have chosen to disregard it almost entirely, substituting in its place everything from emotion to reason, both of which are tainted by the sinful condition of the human heart and, while still possessing merit because of the inherent image we bear and the redemptive work of the Holy Spirit, are secondary to God's Word.
When was the last time you were really serious about Scripture?  And not a momentary conversation spurred on by an intense need created from garbled emotions, but a deep, heartfelt need to acquire wisdom that resulted in commitment.  Information does not equal transformation.  However, there can and should be moments where the realization of something new spurs on deep thought - a pondering.  It is this revelation, when fully realized and applied, that God uses to change us.

Before we can challenge people we need to know Christ.
This is not a comprehensive knowledge, but one of relationship.  Relationships change us; mold us.  This is being made ever more clear to me as I begin a marriage relationship.  Marriage will change you.  As you know Christ you are transformed.
Too often we attempt to challenge people through behavior modification.  We want them to change their actions in hopes that they will become holy, or pure, or whatever word you'd like to use for cleanliness before God.  We attempt to help them achieve the moral equivalent of a well-behaved child.  There is no true and definitive change without the transformation brought about by God, and this "do-as-your-told" Christianity continues to lose validity in this world because it is void.
What we should be doing instead is introducing people to Christ.

Before we can challenge others we need to begin to understand ourselves as new creations.
"It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak.  We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea.  We are far too easily pleased."

  - C.S. Lewis

You are not who you were.  You are new in Christ.  This comes with a new nature (Col. 3:10; Romans 6:6, 18).  Part of sanctification is a new realization of self within Christ.  It's access to your deepest desires as they were meant to be, while still being at odds with the carnal nature that wishes to pacify us with lesser things.
What this means with regards to challenging others comes in three parts.  One is the shedding of guilt associated with the sin that was once in your life and with which you may be struggling.  This guilt, especially when accused by spiritual influence, can be crippling when it comes to approaching another person in relational admonition.  The second is understanding the use of your personal story.  Our testimony is important.  God is the ultimate epic storyteller, and has chosen to use us in His plan.  Lastly, with a new nature comes new skills, propensities, desires, etc.  We talk a lot about grace with regards to the work of salvation in our lives, but that's not all there is.  God continues to bless us within this grace (Romans 12:6; 1 Peter 4:10), giving us talents and abilities that align into His purpose for our lives.  This is the empowerment of grace that extends beyond simply salvation and into sanctification to the glory of God.
Understanding what you've become - how you will change and how you already have - will aid you in helping bring about the change in others.  The acknowledgement of this transformation and the struggle that accompanied it will make you more appreciative of such a transformation in others.  Empathy and sympathy are major components in relating to others, particularly when it comes to their doubts and fears, struggles and turmoils.

Are you equipping yourself to challenge one another?  Sometimes the Scripture you're reading, the struggles in life, and the grace you find along the way isn't just for you.