Knowing Your Heart

We often seek diligently to understand ourselves, in essence, to know our hearts.  The bible teaches that no man knows his heart and that it is "deceitful above all thing" (Jeremiah 17:9).  It is out of our depraved heart that issues forth our actions (Matthew 15:18,19; 12:34,35).  We assume, sometimes quite arrogantly, that a better understanding of oneself will in some way diminish or circumvent the corruption of our heart due to sin.  The greatest lie is the one we tell ourself (I Corinthians 3:18-21).

What is the "heart"?  For the longest time I believed the heart to be the emotions and the mind to be the intellect.  For me, there was was consolation in finding balance between the two.  This is based on my conceptual understanding brought about by our culture.  When we speak of the heart we speak of an emotional response, for the heart is the seat of the emotion in our society.  Likewise, when we refer to the mind we generally associate it with understanding or knowledge.  I was mistakenly under the impression that balance of heart and mind meant that neither ruled over me.  However, if sin has tainted the very core of my being, thus making me filthy, then all of me is affected - both heart and mind.  No amount of balance will ever restore what a sinful nature has taken away.  Consider this:

"The reins, kidneys, were thought by the Hebrews to be the seat of the emotions (cf. Prov 23:16, Ps 16:7; 73:21, Job 19:27).  The heart (Heb leb) was thought to be the seat of the understanding (cf. 5:21).  Thus, when it is said that Jehovah "tries" (i.e. tests or examines) the reins and the heart, it means He is cognizant of man's emotions and affections as well as his purposes and thoughts (cf. 17:10; 20:12, Ps. 7:9; 26:2)." (excerpt from commentary of Jeremiah 17)
- Liberty Bible Commentary

If the heart is linked to understanding, then it is just as much about the mind as it is about the emotion.  And regardless of your understanding of where the seat of the emotion, understanding, intellect, etc., lies,  we all will eventually find our wisdom will never lead to truth.  Whether it's self-discovery or the existence of man, our wisdom will eventually come up null and void.  We require God's wisdom (I Corinthians 1:18-31, I Corinthians 2:6-16, Job 38).  When you begin to consider that what you're reading in the bible as the "heart" refers both to emotion and intellect, basically representing the entirety of man's hidden self, it changes a great deal about what those passages mean.

I don't believe that these concepts are particularly difficult to understand.  Instead, they are hard to accept because we have simply never considered (or cared) what this means to our perception of what the heart is and the subsequent effect it has on our way of thinking.  We want to believe we are right and that we may continue to do things our way.  When you begin to consider that what you're reading in the bible as the "heart" refers both to emotion and intellect, basically representing the entirety of man's hidden self, it radically changes your understanding of what is written.  Every part of you is tainted (Genesis 3:6, Isaiah 64:6, Matthew 7:17-18).  You are totally (not utterly) depraved (Jeremiah 17:9, Genesis 6:5, Romans 3:9-18).  The answer is not finding balance between the part of you that is tainted and the part that has been set aside for God (Galatians 6:15).  It's about the complete renewal of yourself.  God doesn't want the things you have.  He wants to take you and make you completely new! (2 Corinthians 5:17, John 3:5,7, Romans 6:4)

Only God truly knows the heart of a man (Jeremiah 17:10).  He alone knows our purpose and the source of our intentions (Hebrews 4:13).  Despite what sometimes may appear to be the best of intentions, this is the miserable reality we face:  that all attempts to "discover ourselves" apart from God are ultimately futile.  And in our vain attempt to ratify mistakes and make sound decisions without God at the helm, we often seek to "add" God to our lives rather than surrendering all we are to Him.  Without the renewal that the bible speaks of so clearly, we have no hope of knowing ourselves, much less of knowing God.

So what is the answer?

Quite simply, the bible teaches that we should seek God (Acts 17:26-28).   It is one of the most basic and simple principles of the bible, but yet the one we disregard with the most regularity (Isaiah 53:6).  Our tendency is to run away from God, not to Him.  Therefore, we have to be reminded regularly of the things to which we devote ourselves.  This is not accomplished through following a list of "do's" and "don't's" as the Pharisees taught.  Instead, it is about the nature of God.  For example, most of us would say we don't lie because "the bible says not to".  Instead, we don't lie because God is truth.  Lying would then be in direct opposition to the nature of God.  Anything that is direct opposition with God's nature is sin.  This can be applied to an endless number of scenarios.  It also destroys many of the "grey areas" that exist when people suggest "the bible doesn't say anything specifically about that".

For Christians.  The realization that we must "die to self" (Galatians 2:20) should alone be enough for us to know that understand the true essence of who we are who we will be is ultimately impossible apart from God.  We constantly wish to focus internally for answers when there are none to be found in us.  Furthermore, "soul searching" is inadequate when seeking to understand the human heart because of the effect of sin on our minds.  God created us!  Why should we seek answers in anyone or anything else but Him?  Add to this the stark reality that we can never understand our true intentions without God, and we are left with little hope of ever making the right choices and acquiring what God has intended for us.

This is difficult because it changes our focus from learning the do's and don't's to learning about God and seeking Him (Ephesians 2:17-21).   I would suggest that the more we know about God, as it is revealed to us through His Word, His Son, His Spirit, and His creation, the more we can securely stand on what we should do and where are heart is.  Furthermore, as we rely less on ourselves and more on God for provision, the logic behind our reasoning becomes God's wisdom rather than our own.  The world will teach you to take care of yourself first, while God teaches to rely on Him for everything (Proverbs 3:5, 2 Peter 1:3, Philippians 4:13; 4:19, Lamentations 3:22, Numbers 23:19, Romans 8:32).  I would encourage those of you who have already made the commitment to follow Christ to honor this commitment by seeking Him.  Many of you feel empty and lonely, as thought God has gone away from you, when in reality it is you who have moved from Him.  By not seeking Him you have alienated yourself from the grace He wishes to give to you - understanding, joy, and more.

For non-Christians.  Please know that I don't expect you to understand much of this (I Corinthians 2:14-16).  I realize that much of this seems foolish to you, and expectedly so (I Corinthians 1:20-25).  I can promise you that the wisdom of men will fail you.  Ultimately, you will be left bitter and empty on the fallen words of those who cannot be as true to you as your Creator.  Ask yourself what it is that you're missing and why all the answers elude you.  Stop looking at other Christians who are poor mirrors of God's image and those who are self-serving ignorers of God, instead choosing to seek truth rather than excuses.  I believe you'll find there is far more to this Christianity and the Jesus they worship than what you originally believed.  And if you ever choose to seek those answers, let me know.  I'd be happy to help.  :-)

Recommended Reading:
Job 38
Acts 17
I Corinthians 1 & 2